S1:E5 — Billy Bob Thornton

I think there's nothing cooler than being a lone wolf. Except at wolf-picnics when you don't have a partner for the wolf-wheelbarrow races.

The Octomom has reportedly been evicted from her California home. The mother of 14 children packed up and left her property in Palmdale after being asked to leave for not paying her rent for the month of April. The single parent whose real name is Nadya Suleman exited leaving a huge mess and the stench of urine inside the pad. Wait, it says here the urine has been traced back to Adam Eget.

Call me crazy, but I take orders from Martians who send secret messages beamed out from the antenna at the top of the Empire State Building.

A Georgia high school is planning to merge their formerly all black and all white proms into a single event. The theme of this June's dance? 'An Evening of Unbridled Race War'

A Florida man was arrested for stealing a truck filled with $76,000 worth of Campbell's soup.

I, for one, hope this guy goes away for 'Mmm, mmm, good!'

My girlfriend and I have a deal where we have one celebrity that we can sleep with and it's not considered cheating. Mine is that woman who plays Madea.

In Kansas, a gay-rights activist named Aaron Jackson paid $83,000 to buy a house across from the homophobic Westboro Baptist Church and had it painted rainbow colours. Mr. Jackson plans to recoup his investment by... well, actually there's no plan. Have fun living in a hideous house in Kansas across from some vicious bigots!

Its Earth Day!

The one day of the year where you can jerk off outside and nothing bad can happen!

(I don't know what Earth Day is)

A new study shows that most men can identify a gay man by his face alone.

It's the face that's buried in another man's asshole.